------// A FICTIONAL INTERVIEW WITH THE BACKSTREET BOYS...
Rachel: “Hey, you’re here with Rachel from MuchMusic, and I’m here in Florida with The BACKSTREET BOYS!!”
Brian: SHHHHHHHHH! *Looks at Rachel*
AJ: It’s Baywatch, the sequel! I dedicate this to all the lovely, beautiful…sexy ladies in my house tonight. *Humps the floor*
Kevin: *glares at Aj* Canadian eh? *Laughs at his joke but no one else does*
*Camera pans over to Nick*
Nick: What do you want? *Glares at the cameraman.*
Howie: I think Nick’s pissed.
N: Shut up Howie.
R: So tell me about your new album.
No one says anything and they all look at Brian.
R: How bout Nick?
R: Tell me about your new album?
N: I take it you’ve heard about the Millennium? It’s, well you know, coming out on, you know, May 18th, you know what I’m sayin?
K: May 18th!
R: Um, yeah, so tell me, is there anything different on this album that the fans should look forward to?
Aj: We wanted to do a total 360 with this album.
Kevin turns around in a circle to emphasize Aj’s point.
K: On this album right now, that we’re recording right now, writing songs for the next album.
Howie: Nick, what was THAT? *winks*
N: My hand, dumbass!
Kevin: I’m…sorry…about that…Nick…didn’t get…. enough…sleep…. last…. night. *talks slowly*
R: Alright, that’s not a problem. So, how does it feel like to be heartthrobs? I mean, I know I have a little cousin and she thinks Nick is the cutest guy on Earth. Does it affect you in any way?
K: Thank you.
*Nick glares at Kevin*
B: *breaks his silence* Well we’re well grounded. *chews his gum, and smacks it REALLY loudly*
H: It’s very humbilizing. I mean, if I were their age, I’d probably go for Nick.
Aj: But you know, I wouldn’t want cameras in my toilet, especially if I’ve had too many beans…
R: So I hear some of you have charities set up, is that right?
H: Yes we do. *winks* I set up a fund for my sister, *winks* who died of a disease called Lupus and stuff like that, last year. So I set up a charity and stuff like that *winks* for her called the Caroline Cochran Dorough Lupus Fund at Florida Hospital and stuff like that. *winks*
R: Very nice, and you too Brian?
B: Yes I do. I have a charity set up at St. Joseph’s Hospital in Kentucky for children with heart defects whose parents can’t afford open-heart surgery for them. Tyk come here! *lifts Tyk onto his lap*
*Nick yawns, stretches and starts playing with his water bottle. Takes the label off, and reads it*
R: So tell me, what makes the Backstreet Boys different?
K: Well we’re… not… manufactured… like… some… bands are. Brian and I …are from…Kentucky. He’s…my…cousin; I’ve…known him…all…my…life.
Aj: Me and Nick are only children. *pelvic thrust*
H: We like girls. *wink*
N: *whispers* Hey Brian, go over there and I'll come to you like a flying spaceship!
K: *glares at Nick* My way of winding Nick up is to correct him in front of everyone.
R: Ok, so what about your sound?
AJ: We’re different. More mature…sexier. *lifts up his shirt* Yeah I know, I’m a man, Sorry!
N: We each bring our own flavours to the group…
K: Yeah, we each have our own flavours.
N: Like ice cream.
K: Yeah, like ice cream!
*Nick smirks and looks at Kevin*
K: Stop laughing Nick.
R: Ok so who sings what parts?
H: *proudly* I sing the high, falsetto parts!
Aj: Kevin gets all the sexy talking parts.
*Nick stretches again and taps his fingers on the water bottle impatiently*
R: So tell me about what you think of the fans in Canada, and do you have anything you want to say to them?
B: Aj got his foot run over there. It wasn’t funny. *bursts out laughing*
K: We wanna… thank you…um…for all your…love and support.
H: Keepin the Backstreet Pride Alive! *flashes the peace sign*
N: I planned out what I was gonna say but now I forgot…but just to let you know I guess, I am now in Florida, that’s where I resign. And watch out for St. Patrick on Valentine’s Day!
R: Um, well looks like we’ve run out of time, thanks for the interview guys.
H: You're such a dumbass, Nick. Everyone knows that it's St. John who comes and shoots you in the butt!
Aj: I can’t believe you said DA on TV man.
N: I know HOWARD.
H: Stop whining Doofo.
N: I do not! I do not whine!
So there you have it people…. the interview of the century brought to you by none other than the Backstreet Boys. This is fictional and this is humour…meaning…none of it is true…except I did take little snippets of what they did say and put them together...that was fun…haha!